Character Flaws: A Standalone Romantic Comedy Page 9

  His reflexes are good because he snatches the bag as I’ve basically just dropped like it’s hot.

  I’d like to drop him like he’s hot.

  Theo chuckles, amused by my reaction. “Are you okay this morning? Because you seem a little…tense. Did you stay up too late practicing your lines? You shouldn’t worry because you’ll do great today. Our rehearsal last night was perfect.”

  No, not perfect. Had it been perfect, you would’ve gotten naked with me. And I would’ve ridden you like a rodeo bull.

  I’m sure Theo can read my thoughts right now as I think about him naked and all the orgasms he’d give me from his fingers, his tongue and his cock.

  The heat of my blush creeps up my neck, into my cheeks and lands at my ears.

  Yanking my shirt at the collar, I fan myself. “Ugh, the heat is unbearable today. It’s so sticky outside.”

  Not as sticky as it would’ve been with him between your thighs.

  Oh, shut it.

  “Tell me about it,” Marlon interrupts, as I practically jump from my seat and spill my coffee all over my white shorts. “It felt like a brick oven in my apartment last night.”

  Marlon sits down and looks between Theo and me suspiciously, as Theo tries to help me mop up the mess with a napkin.

  “Did I interrupt something?”

  If only he knew the inner dialogue he barged in on.

  “No, not at all-” I say, just as Theo says,

  “Yes -”

  We laugh at the guffaw and Theo shakes his head, bringing the donut to his mouth. I watch with rapt interest as he opens and takes a big bite. His lips curling around the donut. His tongue licking away the remnants.

  “Thanks for the nourishment,” he says, before turning away to head toward the stage. And then he turns his head back over his shoulder and says, “I owe ya one.”

  If only we were thinking the same thing he could pay me back with.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Theo

  Making deals with the devil

  Auditions went exactly as expected. And Birdie and I were on the same page with who we were casting in our principle crew.

  Except for one itty-bitt disagreement over who will play the part of Chester.

  “I think Marlon would be fantastic in that role,” Birdie argues, biting on the edge of her pencil as she leans over the list. “He’s just got that “thing” you know?”

  I harrumph. “Yeah, but he’s too young to play the part. Chester is supposed to be more mature. Worldly. That’s why he’s such a curmudgeon.”

  My argument falls on deaf ears.

  “Yet you want to cast him in the role of Henry. Who is supposed to be seventy? Yeah, that’s not a contradiction.”

  She shakes her head, clearly frustrated with my logic.

  I need to offer up a concession if I want to win this battle and cast myself in the role. I don’t want to steamroll her and pull the “I’m the director” car, because that’s not how I work. Plus, she is the casting director and does have a good eye for talent.

  Which is exactly why she immediately cast Joey as the female lead.

  “Okay, how about this? I know we haven’t really talked about it, but I want to play the part of Chester.”

  She stops me immediately, shaking her head emphatically. “No way.”

  “Yes way,” I contest, because this is how it’s going to be. “I’ll play Chester, Joey will be Silvia and Marlon can play Henry.”

  Birdie rolls her eyes in defiance. “Why did I have a feeling this was going to happen? Do you know how many playwrights I’ve seen try to act out their own characters, only to fuck it up? Come on, Theo. You’re smarter than that.”

  I wave her off because that’s just ridiculousness. I can handle the role, along with directing. It may cause a few challenges, but I’m up for it.

  “I’ve already spoken to Niles and he’s okay with it. So, let’s move forward with what I’ve outlined. And if you don’t think it’s working by the first week, then we’ll revisit. Agreed?”

  I hold out my hand for her to shake on it and she takes it reluctantly. Her points may be valid based on what she’s seen in the past, but I don’t think I’m like most playwrights. I’m not a dictator and I’m not an asshole. My behavior isn’t that of a know-it-all director and I’m good at listening. With the exception of this particular point, of course.

  Plus, I just think Joey and I have really great chemistry and will be the perfect match for my lead characters.

  Selfishly, it also means I’ll have a chance to spend more one on one time with Joey. Which means more scripted kissing. Which I hope will lead to unscripted kissing. Leading to getting her naked. And into her bed.

  That is, if I can keep her away from Marlon.

  An unbidden anger rushes through me as I think about the conversation I overheard between them today as we finished up the class. He’d asked Joey out for dinner and drinks tonight, which I was unable to thwart because of my scheduled casting meeting with Birdie.

  All I could do was ball my hands into fists as I watched them walk out together. Joey did have the decency to look guilty when she glanced over her shoulder as I held the door open for them when they walked out of the building. I winced and gave her a tight smile when she waved her goodbye.

  I don’t know how long I can hold back. She’s the first woman I’ve had any feelings for since my break-up with Alyssa. Maybe I’m different than most other guys out there. I didn’t just go out and fuck away my blues with any willing woman. That’s not me.

  I’ve always enjoyed being in a relationship. Taking care of someone and vice versa. I like the predictability of Netflix and chill nights with a significant other. The comfort of sleeping next to a lover, whom you know will still be around in the morning when you wake.

  God, I’m such a pussy.

  I’ve apparently not learned my lessons from the “alpha dog” incident with Woody. That’s what Joey called it. Which means she thinks I’m a pussy, too.

  I just fear that if I push things, she’s going to retreat. Maybe I’m wrong. All I know is that I feel the connection between us and there’s something that holds her back, but I don’t know if it’s me or something in her past or if there’s someone else she’s interested in.

  Like fucking Marlon.

  I can’t hate the guy. He’s a decent guy and he had the balls to ask her out.

  “Okay, we’ll do it your way. I can live with that. But please don’t make the rookie mistake of falling for your lead lady. She’s not the only one who can satisfy your needs.”

  My head jerks up from the pages laid out in front of me to find that Birdie has moved about six inches closer, her arms squishing her cleavage together as she leans into me. I can smell her popular brand of perfume and I cough.

  Oh shit. This can’t be good.

  “Uh, Birdie…”

  Her long fingers reach out to caress my knuckles. “Theo, you know how I feel about you. I want you to fuck me. Right here. Right now.”

  I sit statue straight, trying not to make any sudden moves as she draws the straps of her blouse down over her shoulder so that the tops of her breasts peak out. Then she puckers her lips and closes her eyes, waiting for me to kiss her.

  We’ve been through this before. While Birdie is a beautiful woman, and an impeccable actress with plenty to her portfolio, she isn’t the one for me. Plus, she stands two inches taller. She’s like an Amazon woman. Nothing wrong with tall women, but I’d be afraid she’d accidentally kill me in bed when she wraps her crazy long legs around me.

  I gently push her shoulders back as her eyes pop open. The flash of blue goes from a lusty-hue to a deep oceanic wave. Confusion. Anger. Bitterness.

  “What the fuck, Theo? Maybe the rumors are true. Maybe you do bat for the other team.”

  Wait, what?

  “People think I’m gay? What the hell?”

  She just shrugs. Maybe she’s saying that as a defense mechanism. Lashing out
to hurt me because I unintentionally hurt her.

  I try to repair the damage the sting of my rejection may have caused.

  “Birdie, come on. I like you. You know I do. We have a great history and working relationship. I think we’ve made a good team. But that doesn’t mean I want to fuck around. You’re great, but we need those boundaries in place. At least until the play is done. Then we can see…”

  Okay, that may be a little misleading and dishonest, but I need to save face. That’s the last thing I need over the next four weeks is a scorned co-director. I don’t want any animosity between us during this production. Everything has to go smoothly. I need this production as a foray into bigger and better things.

  Hopefully Broadway someday.

  Her expression begins to soften as the tightness between her eyes and around her mouth smooths out. That’s when I see the beginnings of a small, calculated smile forming in the corners of her lips.

  I may have just made a deal with the devil.

  Her voice is laced with sex and candy. “Okay, Theo. I can live with that. For now. But just know that at any point, if you need to let off steam, I’m open and available.”

  She runs a tapered fingernail across my collarbone and then stands and walks off, taking her notes, her large endowments and script with her.

  I fear I may have dodged a bullet tonight, but it may come back to bite me in the butt later.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Joey

  He doesn’t kiss and tell

  “How do you like the workshop so far?”

  Marlon sits across the scarred bar table from me, his head tilted in anticipation of my answer. We’ve been here for about an hour, eaten some greasy pub burgers and a basket of fries, and have sipped on beer in the humid bar.

  I’ve enjoyed chatting with Marlon. Why wouldn’t I? He’s a great guy. Handsome, has a devilish sense of humor, and boundless energy.

  But I’m second-guessing my decision to go out with him. I’m afraid he counts this is a date. Which it is not. At some point, this night is going to get progressively awkward if I don’t clarify things soon.

  “It’s definitely not something I ever thought I’d do, not in a million years. I wasn’t even interested in acting in high school when some of my friends were in the theater productions.”

  He nods, one of his dreads falling over his ear. They look really heavy. I wonder what they feel like? I kind of want to reach over and touch one but I think he would get the wrong idea.

  “So, you’re a theater virgin, huh?” he chuckles. “That’s cool. We all have to pop our cherry at some point.”

  I roll my eyes. “And how about you? It sounds like this isn’t your first?”

  “Nah, I was your typical theater geek in high school and I’ve been in a few productions in college. But I wanted to try something different this summer, ya know? Get a new perspective. Hopefully make a name for myself in a small theater company. My big dream is to get to Second City.”

  My eyes widen. “No way. That’s so cool. So many awesome comedians and talent have come from there. Gosh, the list of alumni is huge. Belushi, Akroyd, Martin, Faye, Carrell, Murray. All the greats.”

  “Wow, you really know your history. I’m impressed with your knowledge.”

  I shrug one shoulder. “Well, you can’t live in Chicago without knowing about the John Hancock tower or Second City.”

  Marlon laughs. “Yeah, that’s for sure. But don’t get your hopes up about me. I’ve tried out twice in the last two years and can’t make the cut. I’m also wait listed for their improv program. Sometimes I just want to give up.”

  I make the mistake of reaching my hand across the table and giving it a friendly pat. His dark orbs gaze into mine and he slips his fingers through mine.

  While it’s flattering that I think he’s into me, I don’t feel that same zap of attraction that I do with Theo. Marlon is extremely gorgeous, there’s no question there. And he is downright funny. On several occasions throughout the course of the week, he’s put me in stitches with his witty comments or inappropriate jokes. Humor is so attractive on a man. And his arms are a sight to behold, prominently displayed in the sleeveless tank he’s wearing tonight.

  I squeeze his hand and try to gently tug it away. He won’t let go. Instead, he leans over the table, his lips aiming at mine like a heat seeking missile. And just as he’s two inches from my face, we hear a throat clear and out of my peripheral vision, I see someone standing at the side of our table.

  “Hey guys. Fancy seeing you here.”

  As if I’ve summoned him right to our table to thwart the unwanted kiss, Theo stands there looking comfortable and at ease. Although I do notice a slight tick in his jaw.

  “Hey, teach,” Marlon greets amiably, finally dropping my hand and sitting back. “Pull up a seat and join us. You don’t mind, do you, Joey?”

  He looks so sincere and concerned, I almost feel bad for being relieved at the interruption.

  Um, that would be a resounding no. I don’t mind at all.

  I shake my head. “Of course not. Hi Theo.”

  Theo smirks and pulls out the chair from the table, sitting between Marlon and me. He looks between us and then it’s like it dawns on him what we’re doing here.

  “Oh shit. Did I interrupt something? I can leave you guys alone.” He begins to twist his body to get out of the chair and I grab hold of his forearm.

  ZAP!

  There’s the electric current that I feel anytime I’m with Theo. The same shocking pulse that cratered through my body when we kissed on my couch last night. And here it is again and can’t find the strength to let go.

  Thankfully, Theo takes charge and shifts back in his seat and my hand drops to my side. His eyes spark with mischief as he looks down at his arm and then at my hand.

  Marlon’s voice breaks up our little moment.

  “So, Teach. Have you and Birdie selected your leads? Are you going to make us go all weekend before we find out?”

  Theo rubs his chin, which is covered with a soft bristle in the color of sand. I shiver, remembering exactly what it felt like against my lips. Oh, how I want to feel that everywhere.

  Unfortunately, Theo would more likely want to use it against Marlon’s skin versus mine.

  I sigh and take a sip of my beer, which is already flat and warm, the condensation dripping on the coaster.

  “Birdie and I had some good discussion around the cast member selection. It’s never an easy decision and we have some very good class members this time around, present company included.”

  Marlon’s broad smile is so cute I can’t help but smile too. From the little that I know about Marlon so far, I know he’s destined to make a career out of acting. And I’m glad that Birdie and Theo see his abilities and talent. While I may not be interested in Marlon in a sexual way, I’m proud of him for going after what he wants.

  As for me, taking the acting profession seriously is not going to happen. Not only would my mother absolutely freak over the idea that I wasted my expensive degree, but I don’t think I have the type of competitive drive that’s required for acting.

  Working actors have to be thick-skinned, with the ability to eschew negative criticism and avoid getting their feelings hurt from rejection and hearing the word ‘no’ audition upon audition.

  Or if they do get work, there is always critical feedback about their performances.

  I’m not sure I could stomach that. I’m far too sensitive and get my feelings butt-hurt too often. I know some of my teaching colleagues think I’m made of steel and can stick up for myself, but it’s not easy for me.

  That’s what’s made it so difficult for me as a teacher. I can’t seem to let things go with the kids and their lives. I invest too much of myself in them and when it doesn’t work out the way I hope it does, I’m devastated.

  Marlon finishes his beer and gives Theo a teasing smirk. “You gonna give us an inside scoop? We promise not to tell anyone, right Joey?”
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  He waggles his eyebrows at me mischeviously, as if we’re in cohoots.

  Theo laughs, undeterred. “Not a chance. My lips are sealed.”

  And, of course, that leads me to stare right at his lips. The lips that I’m intimately familiar with from that one, very real kiss last night. The ones that have the perfect texture and pressure when they’re smashed against mine.

  As if he knows what I’m thinking, Theo smacks his lips together, his eyes gleaming with humor and secrets shared.

  Marlon has no clue and hopefully never will. I can totally understand if Theo isn’t into me because of my gender, but there’s no way I want him to fall for Marlon. Even though I’m pretty sure Marlon isn’t into guys, considering he’s been making his moves on me for the past hour, I am jealous of the possibility Theo likes him more.

  “And I don’t kiss and tell.”

  Theo looks at me knowingly and a thrill passes through me, lighting me up like the stage on opening night.

  Damn, him. He’s such a tease.

  My stupid body and emotions betray me because I can feel the heat rising along my chest and neck, straight to my face. How the hell can he possibly think I’m a convincing actress if I can’t even hide my feelings toward him?

  It’s only a matter of time before the cat’s out of the bag and I make a fool of myself.

  Let’s just hope it’s not publicly and I can embarrass us both.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Theo

  I can be bossy

  “Well, I guess I’ll see you guys on Monday,” Marlon says, a slight slur in his speech as we all exit the bar.

  We’d spent the evening laughing, chatting and enjoying conversation about our favorite movies, plays and action heroes. Marlon is a kick in the pants and has a wicked sense of humor.

  I hadn’t meant to break up their date when I joined them tonight. Well, I didn’t have an plan in mind when I heard them talking about grabbing a drink together, but my objective wasn’t necessarily to thwart any romantic interlude.

  Lie.

  Okay. Just because I haven’t been man enough to make my move on Joey doesn’t mean I’m willing to let any other John, Dick or Marlon make theirs.